Realistic Expectations for the Collaborative Divorce Process

What Collaborative Divorce is:

  1. Non-adversarial dispute resolution
  2. Interest-based negotiation (focus on “why”)
  3. Hard work, for clients, attorneys, and team
  4. Efficient use of client resources and professional expertise
  5. Clients learn problem-solving skills and may include a plan for resolution of future disputes
  6. Moves at the pace of the slowest-moving client
  7. Neutrals’ offline processes may be different (MHPs are more likely to complete a parenting plan offline; FPs are more likely to gather information and begin option development offline)
  8. A divorce
  9. A process that allows parents to have equal input into the resolution
  10. A foundation for a healthy co-parenting relationship

What Collaborative Divorce is not:

  1. Conflict-free dispute resolution
  2. Positional bargaining (focus on “what”)
  3. The “easy way out”
  4. Inexpensive – attorneys and neutrals must be paid
  5. Magic – problems and conflicts may still occur in the future
  6. Faster than going to court
  7. Same process for all offline meetings (clients may not have an equal number of meetings with each neutral)
  8. Rainbows and sunshine
  9. A way to manipulate the outcome for selfish motives
  10. A perfect co-parenting relationship